# Turn In Your Man Card!



## Dfrenzy (Dec 18, 2008)

I live across the street from a 100 acre horse farm run by a couple older ladies. Well the lady called me tonight telling me that the guy she had given permission to deer hunt had called in panicsville and is lost in the woods it is now dark. Now remember we live in Ohio where we have no wolves mountain lions and bears that care to eat you and it is pretty warm out tonight. He looks to be around 40 and should know by now that there is no Boogie Man. Well she gave me his number and I tried calling him with no answer after about 5 calls. So I head to my truck to drive back and figured I would blow my horn until he could make it out ok. Well I hear all these sirens comming and thought no way he didn't. Yep he called 911. Now we have like 5 or 6 rescue vehicles out here from Fire and Ambulance to Off road rescue vehicles. So I drove out leading the pack to find the lost Deer Hunter/Woosie Boy. Well after running the sirens and blowing the horn here he came. After seeing his face with the dried tears and the stuffy nose I wanted to laugh rite there. The guy had a light and a cell phone but did he need to call 911.
This is the same guy that was told about crossing the property line and hunting in another hunters tree stand just last week. Now don't get me wrong I think that anyone can be a little scared in the woods after dark to a point but this was a little off base. You might try to walk a little and look for some lights or listen for some vehicle noise to get a direction. My 5 year old thought it was great to be part of the rescue team and now wants to play rescue already.


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## trackdog (Apr 9, 2005)

That sounds like it could be a episode of Jeff Foxworthy's ******* Deerhunter lol.


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## bobberbucket (Mar 30, 2008)

lol that guy should stay home and watch hunting on tv


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## ezbite (May 25, 2006)

I like to call that.......soft and sorry


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## fishintechnician (Jul 20, 2007)

wow! I wanna see him in a 3,000 acre woods or even 500 he would be lost for days!!! maybe you should buy him a gps................or a set of golf clubs!

oh yeah forgot to mention that those squirrels are ferocious!! Watch out he's coming right for us


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## Toxic (May 13, 2006)

Dave, that is a funny story. I think we should turn him loose in Youngstown after dark. Now he would have something to cry about LOL.


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## wave warrior (Oct 2, 2005)

HMMM...scared of the dark, are you kidding me??!! in the woods,with a weapon(i assume bow/crossbow) and i would also ASSUME a knife for dressing...and crying...LMFAO!!! sounds like this dude has NO buisness with a weapon(well maybe a cap gun) or a hunting licence!!


also totally agree with toxic!!


PS. GREAT title and very fitting!!!


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## thegcdawg (May 26, 2008)

toxic said:


> dave, that is a funny story. I think we should turn him loose in youngstown after dark. Now he would have something to cry about lol. :d


hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!


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## Snakecharmer (Apr 9, 2008)

Any bets on whether he was carrying a pink barbie bow?


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## bkr43050 (Apr 5, 2004)

I am in no way trying to justify his actions because I agree with everyone here that it is really hilarious. But just how big was this property that he was on? To think that he just wasted the time and money of people to come in 5-6 rescue vehicles to search for an uninjured person in over 50° temperatures. That guy needs to turn in a lot more than his man card!!

Has this guy ever hunted before? I mean how many hunters do not end up walking through the woods in the dark on their way in or out at some point? And since the story was type at 9:42 in the evening he could not have been in the woods more than an hour or so after dark before panicking. It will be a looong time before he lives that one down.


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## fishintechnician (Jul 20, 2007)

a.) you have a light
b.) you have a bow
c.) your in ohio

just keep walking you will find the edge of the woods sometime.
I get a kick out of these yupies that think they are "hunters" beacuse they have a bow/gun and go to the woods.

dfrenz if you would of laughed at him ( which I would have, don't think I could of helped myself) I bet he would of started crying again!!


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## Slawterr (Aug 18, 2009)

> I get a kick out of these yupies that think they are "hunters" beacuse they have a bow/gun and go to the woods.


haha indeed

I'm not master outdoorsman or anything, but get this guy some boy scout handbooks or something.


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## Skarfer (Jan 27, 2006)

I'd have asked him if he wanted to sell all his huntin crap to you - for real cheap! HAHA! I'm sure he's done now........if not, he should be!


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## One Legged Josh (Jan 27, 2008)

I have hunted in some of the most "remote" places in Ohio. Never once in any of these places have I not been able to hear traffic! Stop and listen, a car will drive by. It was only a hundred acres, he should have called his mommy.

Ps. Ive never been lost, just powerfully confused for an hour or two!


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## bkr43050 (Apr 5, 2004)

One Legged Josh said:


> I have hunted in some of the most "remote" places in Ohio. Never once in any of these places have I not been able to hear traffic! Stop and listen, a car will drive by. It was only a hundred acres, he should have called his mommy.
> 
> Ps. Ive never been lost, just powerfully confused for an hour or two!


Wow! If it was only 100 acres he certainly should have had little problem getting out.

I have certainly hunted some remote areas as well in Ohio and several were outside of traffic noise. But the thing is you pick a direction and start walking. Within 100 acres you should be able to make it out with less than a mile of walking even if you started near one edge.

Only one time was I ever concerned that I was not going to make it out of the woods without a considerable delay. I was hunting about a very large wooded area near Brinkhaven and I knew the 80 acre section that I was hunting but not extremely well. It was quitting time and so I started following a ridge back toward what I thought was the top that I had started on. It took me a pretty lengthy climb to discover that the ridge I was climbing did not run the right direction and had in fact led me on a tangent. I was not scared however but did get in more of a hurry in the last minutes of somewhat navigable light to right my course otherwise I knew I was going to have to totally backtrack and go back up the way I had come in. It was simply that I didn't want to have to do it in the total darkness. But like I said that never caused me nearly enough concern to think about calling for help (no cell phones then anyway) or worrying about whether I was going to make it out or not.

I did really learn a lesson in that though. I learned that a compass can be a very valuable piece of gear to carry along. Had I had the compass on that occasion it would have taken a quick glance to realize that I had gone off course and I could have corrected it very quickly. In the dark and in the woods you lose total sense of which way is north, south, etc.

I still can not imagine how embarrassed that guy must be feeling today.


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## Fish-N-Fool (Apr 12, 2004)

I've gotten turned around in woods mushroom hunting in OH and popped out on the opposite side I "thought" I was located, but never hunting. This seems like he should be receiving an invoice for wasted tax payer money IMO.

I will admit I have been "lost" temporarily in the mountains in TN while hunting.
I didn't have a compass (foolish) and it was before GPS was readily available. I took the wrong path and rounded the opposite side of the mountain. It was dark before I realized I wasn't going the right direction. I had a hand held flashlight, but no cell phone. I headed back to the top of the mountain to where I could see a large clear cut on the opposite mountain - I knew where to go from there. I was nearly back when I started hearing gun shots fired about every 5 minutes. It was my group firing a .30-06 from very near the property. I was too young and foolish to be overly concerned - I was also confident I knew where I was heading after locating the clear cut. I think it scared the group I was with more than me. They didn't want me hunting more than a few hundred yards behind the house after that & I took quite a "ribbing" the rest of the trip

My only experience being lost besides a 2 hour detour in KY hunting bushy tails - but that was in daylight


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## bkr43050 (Apr 5, 2004)

Fish-N-Fool said:


> I've gotten turned around in woods mushroom hunting in OH and popped out on the opposite side I "thought" I was located, but never hunting. This seems like he should be receiving an invoice for wasted tax payer money IMO.


I kind of was thinking the same thing. I also wonder what he told the 911 dispatcher to warrant them sending that many people after him. I would think if the call came in simply as, "I can't find my way out of the woods.", then the response to him should have been, "Start walking in one direction until you exit the woods and call us back." As was mentioned it was probably over 50° and he was not injured. It just didn't seem to be what would be deemed an emergency.


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## slaughtereyez (Jul 13, 2009)

Wow what a wimp, sorry...Maybe I should drop him of for an exclusive hunt on our property in West Virginia, Ill put him down in the holler where I was tracking a deer after dark one time with howling all around me, he should enjoy that experience....sounds like someone who gets scared when he hears chipmunks running through the leaves...


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## MuskieManOhio (Jun 29, 2008)

Ya thats pretty funny! I once was talking to my friends dad and the first question he ever asked me about hunting was what kind of camo I wore LMFAO!


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## killingtime (Apr 29, 2009)

i would like to see him on the show SURVIVER.


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## Huntinbull (Apr 10, 2004)

I can understand being "temporarily misplaced or confused", but to call 911 with a story hairy enough to warrant 5-6 rescue vehicles. Tisk, tisk. On the other hand, the rescue team probably all just came because they never get those calls. Just this morning, myself and two others (one of which is an OGF member) got turned around while rabbit hunting. Ended up 600-700 yards from where we expected to come out. got it figured out in a hurry though. Unloaded our guns (since we were on property we didn't have permission for) and walked the edge of the woods to the correct property. No biggie, though I felt bad for getting us turned around.


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## Dfrenzy (Dec 18, 2008)

Well guys he didn't show up tonight. He has been there everynight for the past two weeks. I may have to sneak in to the woods at dusk and haunt him if he ever comes back. I thought everyone here would like to hear how there tax dollars were being spent. The fire department was very professional about the whole thing and never did crack a joke about it. I on the other hand was a little less professional about finding PEE WEE in the woods. I bet we could take him on a good snipe hunt huh. Oh and someone asked about the time he called 911 at 6:15.


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## foundationfisher (May 12, 2008)

on getting lost---- last year up north --- drove my truck a mile out on the ice. first time driving on ice,( scared to death) . gets dark. gonna fish at nite. watched everyone drive to the boat ramp. 2 hours later, heading home, going the same way, can't find the ramp. 45 minutes later, getting scared, a local came out of his house and gave me directions. "go across the lake (1 mile), turn toward the red light, (1 mile) . we were getting close to the dam where the ice was thin. getting lost can happen to anyone.


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## fishintechnician (Jul 20, 2007)

FF I htink that is alittle different I could undestand getting lost on a lake with distinct marking just white but a small woods that if he has been there the last two weeks should know fairly well is another story. I agree anyone can get lost but to freak ou tlike this come on. Frenz you should get a coyote caller and put the speaker close to his stand hit the howel a couple times and I bet he is to scared to come down have to have the firedepartment come out with the ladder truck this time.


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## bkr43050 (Apr 5, 2004)

Called 911 at 6:15??? Wow!!! I guess he gave it quite an effort on his own before calling then. I have not even been climbing out of my stand until that time at nights.

That was no doubt a real waste of the fire department's time and money.


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## Hook N Book (Apr 7, 2004)

It wouldn't be surpising if he has a GPS on his cell phone...!


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## James F (Jul 2, 2005)

Got turned around in a snow storm, foot prints filling in so fast I couldn't follow them back the way I came. This place was larger than the Hundred Acre Wood!! Made it out just after dark.Didn't panic , but made me think about how i wasn't prepared to spend the night in there.


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## Smallmouth Crazy (Apr 4, 2006)

He wont be pushing his luck out there next time, he will be out of that stand and headed to the car at 4.30.


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## ouflyboy9 (Aug 12, 2008)

Dfrenzy said:


> Well guys he didn't show up tonight. He has been there everynight for the past two weeks. I may have to sneak in to the woods at dusk and haunt him if he ever comes back. I thought everyone here would like to hear how there tax dollars were being spent. The fire department was very professional about the whole thing and never did crack a joke about it. I on the other hand was a little less professional about finding PEE WEE in the woods. I bet we could take him on a good snipe hunt huh. Oh and someone asked about the time he called 911 at 6:15.


wait a minute.... this guys been hunting the same 100 acres for two weeks and still got lost. how'd he get out the other nights?


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## bdawg (Apr 14, 2009)

At 6:15 you should still be able to see some fading light in the sky. Doesn't he know which direction the sun sets? 

I was turned around at West Branch once while bunny hunting, but I still knew where the lake was and the roads compared to my car. Just made it a longer hike than I wanted.


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## fish on! (Oct 15, 2009)

5 or 6 rescue vehicles? Sounds like no one wanted to miss the opportunity to see this "hunter" first hand. You could have sold tickets.


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## Dfrenzy (Dec 18, 2008)

Well wouldn't ya know it this morning the lost sole shot himself a 13 pointer. I wondered as I looked out my front window this morning I saw two more vehicles show up. No they wern't rescue vehicles just his friends to help him get his deer out of the woods. I was also told that he was picked on so bad at work they had to move him to a different shift.


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## mikeshookset (Feb 28, 2005)

hmmhad been hunting the same woods for 2 weeks gets lost and call 911 at 615 sounds like he should have listened to nancy reagan when she said ( just say no) lol and then they wonder why they cant get pot legalized lol


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