# bullying



## castmaster00 (Oct 23, 2007)

there are some kids in my lunch that keep calling me trailer trash just because i live in a double wide. they keep pushing food at me as an insult when i cant buy my own lunch. i need some advice on how to handle this . do you guys have any ideas?


----------



## APD1088 (Apr 14, 2004)

Do you attend Akron Public Schools?


----------



## SConner (Mar 3, 2007)

Ignore them, they are idiots.


----------



## AnthHol (Jul 24, 2007)

I'm only 20 but ive been there and seen it. Just keep your head on straight and get where you want to be. Odds are if you do, those will be the kids working for you one day. Its crazy how tables can turn. In the long run, they are meaningless to you.


----------



## fishintiger (Apr 26, 2004)

Don't let them get to you. This is one of the times that you need to be the bigger man and just "walk away" and ignore them. You can always get the principal or a counselor involved. That way if you happen to whoop on one of them they will know that there were previous problems between you. Just because they live in a house and you live in a trailer doesn't make them any better than you.


----------



## Nipididdee (Apr 19, 2004)

Sound like the case of them building themselves up, by putting others down.

A sure sign of their own problems with themselves.

Look 'em in the eye and treat them as you wanna be treated, move onward.

If they remain persistant, going out of their way to get your goat, don't let them win by giving in- that's their game. Definately move towards adult resources at this point and get them invovled to at least be aware of whats happening.

I wish you the best, kids are by far the meanest group of humans onthe planet. 

Handle this with maturity and not anger, only then can you elevate yourself above them.

nip


----------



## Wannabitawerm (Apr 13, 2004)

As you get older, you'll realize their opinions don't matter. Walk away or use your wits. You can't solve problems with violence as that leads to more violence. Walk away.

FYI, I'm 34 years old with 4 boys and I live in a trailer park. Anyone who thinks less of me because of it, I have 1 thing to say, 

"Thank you for taking the time out of your busy day to occupy your thoughts with my family and I. I didn't realize I was that important to you! I personally never wasted my time thinking about you, but now I will try to set some time aside to think about your situation. Maybe when I'm in the bathroom..."

By the way, when they push food at you, say thanks and save your money for something else!!!


----------



## sharon time (Jun 20, 2004)

I Know that kids can really be mean and hatefull. I have coached baseball / Boy scouts. Easy to say but you HAVE to ignore those mosquito brains. Regardless of how right you are, when you try to go it alone you will end up smelling like dog doo, they will end up smelling like roses. You need to go to the teachers / school counselor. It may not be a bad idea to talk to your church pastor. Maybe he could help you out. But don't get involved in exchanging punches because I'm sure you will be the one seen throwing the last punch and you will go DOWN. They never see who thru the first. BELIEVE me this is from experince. Its hard to be the bigger MAN but you have to walk away.


----------



## Lewis (Apr 5, 2004)

Being born into a family with limited financial rescources is certainly not your fault.
Dont be ashamed of it.
You have a few short years before you are an adult.
Work hard and persevere and you will dig yourself out of poverty.
Just hold your head up and dont let the other kids mean spirited immaturity get the best of you.
Man...you shouldnt be going without lunch.
Does your school have a free or reduced price lunch program?


----------



## WalleyeGuy (Apr 9, 2004)

Kick there usless cowardly rear ends and be done with it.
When the adults show up, odds are, it will then be taken care of.
Then they will only call you trailer trash behind your back, with no nads to do it in front of your face.


----------



## junkyardbass (Mar 19, 2006)

Sorry to hear about your problem bro. Unfortunitly for you the advice everyon has given you so far is exactly right. There isn't a whole lot you can do about it. Get your teachers involved, try your best to just ignore them. I'm sure you already know all this. Being 13 sucks bro. When you get to be older you'll forget all about those jerks. Best thing you can do is keep your nose in the books,grow up, get better job than those idiots. Then at your 10 year reunion rub it thei faces.


----------



## MadMac (May 2, 2005)

Part of me wants to tell you what to do but the other part knows it's not my place. Talk to your parents.


----------



## buzzedredneck (Jun 26, 2007)

I Guarantee U Prob Have More Room In Your Double Wide Than I Do My Small House, Besides, Have You Seen The Prices On Them? Many Cost More Than A House Around This Area. I Used To Live In A 14 By 70 With A Wife And 2 Kids B4 Anyway, People , Esp Other Kids Can Be Sooo Demeaning. I Teach My Kids That When Theyre Made Fun Of Or Laughed At, Laugh Back And Take The Food As It Were, It Hurts The Offenders More If U Agree With Them And Maybe Theyll Quit.in 5 Years , All Of This Will Be Meaningless Anyway. Good Luck.


----------



## seapro (Sep 25, 2007)

Insecure people try and make other people feel insecure. I can tell by your post, you are to smart to fall for that! 
Walk away from them knowing they have very little character and that by your ability to walk away, proves you have more! 
There are always people who will walk on others to try and make themselves feel better. They only end up proving their ignorance and insecurity to those people who are far more intelligent. 
Do you want to be known as one of them or as a person that is bigger and smarter then they are? I already know the answer to that question as I'm sure you do. Hold your head up high - you have already defeated them! 

If you can not get help with lunches like Lewis suggests, please send me a Private Message.


----------



## Kindlebeard (Apr 6, 2004)

I got to agree with MadMac. Talk to your Parents, let the school know you are being bullied they have rules about bullying.

Just know you got alot of sportsmen behind you! And we don't care about where you live. The only thing that matters is can you tell us where your best fishing spots are?????? 

Let the length of this thread show you, that you are worth more than they say you are.


----------



## jcustunner24 (Aug 20, 2007)

The mere fact that you can log onto this site and converse with a bunch of grown men as well as you do points to how intelligent you are. Most people have been bullied at one point or another, and like others have said, those bullied kids end up being the popular ones later in life. As high school progresses and college begins, you'll find yourself with a group of friends they never had -- true ones -- and you'll be able to politely ask them for fries with your burger. Bullies are ignorant, and if it is serious enough that it affects your emotional state it can't just be ignored. There are organizations and resources available to you via the internet that offer advice and free counseling. If you'd like a link to one of those places, please feel free to send me a pm. You strike me as a very intelligent kid and where you live should have nothing to do with how you view yourself. Keep your head up, and remember that bullies don't come around the lake -- fishermen are like an unofficial fraternity -- keep on fishin'


----------



## joe01 (Apr 16, 2004)

hey kid we all have been there on one side or the other, take the advise of eveyone, And remember to talk to the man up above, he can help you. Just say a little prayer for them


----------



## LittleMiamiJeff (Oct 1, 2005)

I agree with everyone that says walk away and be the bigger man.
Here's something to chew on, that hasn't been mentioned yet.
You may or may not know Jesus as your Lord, but this would be His general advice: LOVE is the key here, these bully's are behaving from a lack of true love in their lives, you could be the one to actually start loving them. 
And BTW, true love would mean having them answer for their negative behavior toward you and others, by being disciplined by the PROPER authorities.
LMJ


(Mat 5:43) Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hate thine enemy.

(Mat 5:44) But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;

(Mat 5:45) That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.

(Mat 5:46) For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?

(Mat 5:47) And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so?

(Mat 5:48) Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.


----------



## Fishin' Coach (May 19, 2004)

Keep your head up, try to ignore it bullies will usually move on to someone else when there actions don't get the desired effect, a reaction out of you.

As a schoolteacher myself I would agree to talk about this problem with a teacher you could trust or a school counselor, many times this has a greater effect than talking to the principal.

Kids can be jerks, but I will second the chorus... I've seen where bullies end up years later, Trust me you'll get the last laugh!!!

God Bless
--coach


----------



## Fisherman419 (Dec 2, 2006)

Don't lose any sleep over it. If you show that it bothers you, then they are going to keep doing it. 
1) Beat there a**es outside of school so you don't get in trouble with school, If you think you can handle them. Or,
2) I guess the mature thing (like everyone else is saying) would be to tell an adult about it, in many cases the principal may be useless and just dig you in a deeper hole, but find someone that will do something that you can trust. Or,
3) I like this idea if you arent into fighting. Get somebody a few years older (if you are 13, get a 16 or 17 year old) to throw em around a bit. I gaurantee they won't mess with you anymore. 

What school do you go to?


----------



## 1st shirt (Jan 11, 2008)

Hey Castmaster

Been there myself, and it's no fun. I'm a little bit vertically challenged so I had the opportunity to meet several bullies when I was younger. Believe me when I tell you more will be accomplished by your mature actions than by violence. You sound really smart, so if you can't ignore them, outthink them. An example: Ask if they need help with their school work, because the way they act it's obvious they aren't very smart. ;o} If they say yes, then help them!!! Really, you've been given some great advise on this post. Don't try to handle it by yourself. There are adults in your life that will know what to do and be happy to help you. Just make sure you pick some you can trust. Always remember, it's always better to ignore ignorance!!! Unless it's yours.


----------



## JIG (Nov 2, 2004)

Its one thing to call someone names and push food around. If it ever comes to more than that I would suggest FINISHING it. My old man told me if you start something you better finish it! If you get your butt kicked for something you said,Well dont come crying too me! Like as mentioned. Hold your head up and dont eat alone. Might slow things down a bit.


----------



## Wannabitawerm (Apr 13, 2004)

If the guy challenges you to a fight, let us know when and where. We'll show up several thousand members strong and after they run... we'll have a tourney!!!!!


----------



## Spaniel235 (Jun 19, 2005)

Your school should have a "anti-bully" hotline that is linked to the state department of education. Your school will get an anonymous report. It is now a state law that schools cannot allow bullying to occur. Talk to your guidance counselor or a teacher in the meanwhile...


----------



## LEJoe (Jun 27, 2006)

I used to hold off bullies with one of the easiest, cheapest, most effective weapons known to man. A smile. I would just give them a nod and a small smile and they could never figure out what I was up to. Drove them nuts to the point that they moved on to bug somebody else. Be proud of who you are and where you are going. Always do what you know is right and you can look back at these days knowing YOU did the best you could.

Remember that EVERYBODY has problems. It's how we handle these problems that constitutes our worth. Try the smile thing. It works. It really does. Shows confidence. Bullies don't like confidence. Chin up.

Lake Erie Joe


----------



## Bobinstow90 (Apr 13, 2006)

Lots of people have lived thru similar events growing up. Believe it or not, you are learning a lot living thru this experience.   

Sometimes, we learn how to treat others in life BECAUSE of how others have been unkind to us. Sucks.....but thats how life is sometimes. Learn what ya can , keep a calm approach......and keep fishin. 

Now, where exactly is your best bass spot....and what is the best bait/ presentation there? Just tell me.....I won't tell anyone else.


----------



## paston1 (Jan 31, 2008)

Kids are cruel. Hold your head up and be proud of who you are. I went through similar things when I was your age. Made me mad as H**L. They will not let you alone if you let it get to you. Never stoop to their level. Oh yeah and I live in an old modular home and have a very good paying job. So its not where you live that make you who you are its how you handle yourself and who you know you are. Good Luck and God speed..


----------



## Boom Boom (May 31, 2005)

Hold your head high! You have absolutley nothing to be ashamed of. I grew up in a similar situation. Here's a thought (not about the bullys). You seem smart and mature for your age. Have you ever thought about going to college? I know it may seem years off but there is a way you could go if you start now. I'm talking about the Evans Scholarship. It is a 4 year full ride scholarship for being a golf caddy. Here are the 4 qualifications:

1) Be a golf caddy at a reputable country club for 2 summers.
2) Graduate in the top 25% of your high school class.
3) Show leadership abilities (clubs, class politics, etc.)
4) Be in financial need.

Not too many people know about this. Yes, there is work involved but it can be done. I know, I am living proof. Good luck with everything & take the time to check out the Evans Scholarship program on the web.


----------



## Hoosier Daddy (Aug 19, 2005)

Kudos to the many who have responded with good advice.

Two stories:

Last week I was playing hoops and got into a confrontation with someone who I thought did me very wrong (dileberate/blatent cheap shot). My first instinct was to shove this guys head down his neck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got inhis face and was about to let it fly when for some reason I walked away composed my self and slapped hands saying let play some ball. Part of me still wants to clober the %^&(^$&, but I have gained th repect of all who play there and will still be able to enjoy playing there. Had I decked the guy I would have felt good for a few minutes and then realized I ruined a good thing.

Lesson learned. Even though taking the high road is difficult it is definitely worth it and the right thing to do. It took me 30yrs to learn this so you can get a huge head start on me.

Second one. We had a family in our school who was picked on for various reasons including finances. In high school it continued,but lesser so. I went to college and came back in town later in the year and ran into one of the familes kids who graduated in my class. He was having a great time and seemed to know everyone at the party. I made my way over and talked abit with him. All the while being interrupted by numerous people including some nice looking ladies wishing him well or just saying hello. I continued to run into him over the years and he is one of the happiest and well liked folks you would ever meet. I was puzzeled by how people could have been so mean to him back in school. The I realized that kids are immature/stupid/mean/confused/ect... and they can make folks miserable. Then suddenly when you reach college/work world people realize what matters. It isn't your clothes/car/house, it is that people can count on you when they need you, that you are fun to be around, that you care, that you are a good person.

It was like a magic do over in college for most people. I remeber meeting people and thinking that guy looks like a dork/spaz/nerd ect..., but realizing I don't know anything about them except for their appearance. The people who are shunned in most adulthood are people who judge and belittle.

Lesson learned. If you are a good person and enjoyable to be around you will find folks who will want to be your friend eventually. The folks who are giving you a hard time will eventually learn their leson or be doomed to be miserable.

In the short term I wish I had some better advice for you. I was always sefely hidden in the middle not the on being picked on or the one doing the picking. I wish I would have spoken up more when I was younger for the ones being picked on. Just standing by and letting it happen juste fuels the fire of the bullies.

Either way hope this helps a little. Good luck this is part of growing up, but I believe you will handle this well and continue on a great path.


----------



## FishJunky (May 20, 2004)

I work in a public school and see this alot. Talk to a teacher and tell them whats going on. If you don't want these kids to know you said somthing tell the teacher to keep a eye on whats happening to you during lunch. That way it looks like you had nothing to do with the teacher knowing whats going on. There are alot of kids that think if they taddel on someone it will come back to haunt them, and sometimes it does. If you do it this way the other kids have no idea you went to talk to someone. Just be the stronger person and don't try to get them back. It is uselly the person who strikes out 2nd that gets caught. You have plenty of friends here. Let us know how it goes.


----------



## dcross765 (Oct 20, 2005)

I've been where you are. Everything these guys are telling you is true. But the sad reality of it is is that this problem will not go away any time soon. I live in Akron and have bunches of relatives in the public school system. Things here do'nt get resolved until it becomes a REAL BIG problem. You should talk to your parents and have a discussion with them and the principal. If after that things do'nt get better pm. me and we'll see what we can do. I was in your shoes for a long time. Finally i found them one at a time and got the job done. I'm not saying this is the way you should do it, but if that is what it takes then eventually you will have to stand up for your self. Find the biggest kid in school and be his new best friend and see where that gets you, this works. If he does'nt want to be your best friend i'll give you 10$ that'll change his mind. Sounds like your a smart kid. Keep your head on straight and you'll go far.


----------



## walleyevision (Aug 4, 2005)

Lots of good advice so far. like some have said, stick up for yourself, unfortunatly bullying wont go away on its own. When i was young my parents got divorced and I moved with my mom from ashtabula to columbus. Kids made fun of the way I talked and my clothes. I once got up in front of my class for sharing day and talked about how I loved sauna's ( I come from a family of finns), a bigger kid who had been riding me for a while really laid into me about this, calling me dirty cause i liked saunas more than baths, well I stood up for myself and got 2 things.. A black eye and a bloody lip! But I got something else too, respect, not only from the bully but from other classmates as well. I was not picked on after that like before.

I am in no way telling you to fight, you can stand up to a bully with words, dont give them the satisfaction of letting it get to you and remember most bullys are full of hot air ALL BLOW AND NO SHOW!

Just get good grades work hard and go to college. Then show up to your class reunion in your nice car, with your good looking woman and when they say Hey man whats up, act like you dont even know them!

I seriously hope your situation improves. Stay positive dont let them get you down.


----------



## NUM1FIRE (Nov 12, 2005)

its better to walk away, they could be the kind of people waiting on you to throw a punch and then the next thing u and your family are getting sued for assault. then where will u be?


----------



## WB185Ranger (May 18, 2006)

Kids can be so mean  ............you are a Better person than all of the bullies put together. Keep believeing in yourself!  WB


----------



## alan farver (Apr 9, 2005)

i was bullied in school.i went to a very small closed minded country school.just don't let them get to you.most of the people that bullied me don't have as good a job as me or make as much money.funny how things work out


----------



## blance (Apr 5, 2004)

There's not much I can add to what's already been said. I think most can say been there, done that when it comes to the situation you're in. No matter what, do not give in to their incessant baiting or they have beaten you. I don't know you or what kind of person you are, but I have always been the kind of person that will not be beaten by someone I feel is inferior to me. It's simply a matter of pride for me and not arrogance. 

When I was younger (much, much) and in high school, I lived in a trailer too. It was all my mother could afford after my father and her split up. There was a group of kids that would harass me all the time to the point of ganging up and beating the snot out of me when I walked home from school. I fought back best I could, but 4-on-1 just ain't fair and while getting a shot or two in, I don't recall every getting the better of it. day in, day out it never really got any better until I finally just quit going to school to avoid the whole situation. Finally I wised up and stopped worrying about them and got my butt back in school (truancy officer helped). As I became determined and focused on what I needed to do to better myself, I found the less relevant they became not only to me, but also in the bigger picture of the adolescent society that was high school. Seems those type of people never advance only regress and eventually life passes them by. Fast forward twenty years. I have a beautiful family, live in a very nice community, have a good job. The gang 'o 4??? None finished high school. Last I heard many years ago one was wanted by the law for running around Warren (OH) stealing lawn mowers and snow blowers out of peoples garages to support his crack habit. Two ended up in prison no too long out of school and the one ended up dead. I took care of my business and since none were around for our 20 year class reunion or the names even mentioned, I can only assume that living well is really the best revenge.

Keep your head up and stay focused on taking care of YOUR business my friend and the rest will take care of itself.

Barry


----------



## RareVos (Jul 29, 2007)

castmaster00 said:


> there are some kids in my lunch that keep calling me trailer trash just because i live in a double wide. they keep pushing food at me as an insult when i cant buy my own lunch. i need some advice on how to handle this . do you guys have any ideas?



Well, I can certainly relate to this. I grew up in a double wide, and know first hand where you are coming from. I can offer some advice that may not fix your immediate problem, but more for the long term.

Don't just "ignore" these kids... don't BELIEVE them. Your self esteem is the most valuable asset you have. Learn to use it and good things will happen for you. Define yourself by your actions and not by people's ignorant opinions. Seriously.


----------



## BigSmallieMike (Oct 20, 2005)

I am sorry to hear about your situation. I'm sure you can see from the number of responses that there are a lot of people out there willing to listen and share advice and personal experiences. And that's just from a bunch of fishing nuts from across the state!
Keep the people who matter to you and care for you in mind and make every effort to give these guys no heed. Make intelligent and practical decisions. Avoid situations if practical, walk away from conflicts if you can, and defend yourself if you must. Seek help from whoever you think is appropriate - be it family, teacher, counselor, youth leader, preacher, officer, or really anyone capable of helping you beyond offering the advice so widely shared in this thread. 
I understand it can be difficult, but remember that your worth is not found in what others think of you but in what you make of yourself. I wish you the best. Please let us know how you are doing as the school year progresses.


----------



## BigSmallieMike (Oct 20, 2005)

I am sorry to hear about your situation. I'm sure you can see from the number of responses that there are a lot of people out there willing to listen and share advice and personal experiences. And that's just from a bunch of fishing nuts from across the state!
Keep the people who matter to you and care for you in mind and make every effort to give these guys no heed. Make intelligent and practical decisions. Avoid situations if practical, walk away from conflicts if you can, and defend yourself if you must. Seek help from whoever you think is appropriate - be it family, teacher, counselor, youth leader, preacher, officer, or really anyone capable of helping you beyond offering the advice so widely shared in this thread. 
I understand it can be difficult, but remember that your worth is not found in what others think of you but in what you make of yourself. I wish you the best. Please let us know how you are doing as the school year progresses.


----------



## blance (Apr 5, 2004)

> they keep pushing food at me as an insult when i cant buy my own lunch. i need some advice on how to handle this .


Open a savings account at your local bank. Each and every day, I'd pretend I didn't have money for lunch and take whatever food they wanted to push onto me. Be sure to thank them and tell them how gracious they are. On your way home from school, deposit your lunch money into the bank. If you really want to throw it in their faces, thank them at the end of the year for all the money [insert $$ balance] they've made for you to buy fishing supplies this summer and tell them you'll be there accepting charity next year too. 

They'll never offer you food again if they don't stop after you begin happily taking it form them much sooner (money you are costing them > joy derived from making fun of you). 

Remember P.T. Barnum... If there's going to be one born every minute, there's absolutely no reason you can't capitalize on them.

Just a thought.


----------



## Brad617 (Apr 12, 2006)

Start with your parents. Someday you will realize that other people like them dont matter. Good luck and keep your head up and smile. (it will bother them more than fighting them)...


----------



## johnny fish (Feb 20, 2005)

Asking advice from a bunch of adults on this site shows that you are much more mature than these kids that are bullying you. My advice to you would be to talk to a teacher or adminastrator at your school so they are aware as to what is going on and as for how you feel emmotionally I would suggest talking to someone. Someone I would recomend on this site is preacherman he is actually the pastor that married my wife and I,my wife has Known him and his family a very long time and thinks very highly of him as do I,send him a PM. His name is Tom he's a good man and I am sure that he could be of assistance to you. Just keep your chin up things will get better!


----------



## Crappieking2001 (May 31, 2004)

My dad always said just ignore it, my mom always said kill em with kindness.
I said can't i just use my hands, listen to my mom and dad,


----------



## Crappieking2001 (May 31, 2004)

ignorance raise its ugly head again, bad bad advice , we have enough of that.


----------



## Fat Bill (Jan 16, 2006)

Its almost hard to believe that there is so much good advice from old farts whose major desire in life is to fish. Listen to them! After teaching for 35 years, I am still amazed at the number of people who find humor in giving people grief.
The bullying hot line from school is a good choice, use it first. Then talk to a teacher you admire and trust and ask him/her for advice. Then, if nothing seems to work, try to avoid them. But, keep you head and don't do anything radical. 

Good luck.
Incidentally, I think you post has had the most response of any I have ever read. There are a lot of really good people out here who wish you the best.


----------



## lateral_line (Jun 9, 2005)

Crappieking2001 said:


> ignorance raise its ugly head again, bad bad advice , we have enough of that.


glad to see they got rid of that post! great job mods!


----------



## CoolWater (Apr 11, 2004)

Definately talk to a school administrator that has some authority, and your parents, let them know the situation if you haven't already.

Also, speaking from experience, two things will happen in life... 1. You'll grow to realize that those who put you down weren't worth two cents and you shouldn't have let them get to you. 2. The people that are putting you down will get older and more mature and wish that they never had done the mean spirited things they did. It will haunt them the way they treated people.

Remember, the people that are the biggest bullies are the people that are the most insecure. It's a basic instinct for them to attack someone else as to not have anyone point out their faults first. I hope you understand what I am saying and hope you keep in good spirits.

Let us know how it is working out...


----------



## bassmastermjb (Apr 8, 2004)

We all had our share of the school bully sometime growing up.I am just amazed it still goes on as often as it does. All you have to do is watch the news and read the papers.It started with Columbine in Colorado, now it seems like every week someone goes over the edge due to being pushed too far.The schools need to keep a better eye on the thugs, because they know who they are.I have a very good story related to this:
I was at my 10 year reunion back in 89'.As you all know, the hot chicks in school got fat and ugly and the ugly ducklings turned into smokin' hotties.I was at the bar having a drink with one of my welding buddies when he says" Holy ****, Who The Hell Is That". It happened to be one of the overweight girls in school that transformed into a goddess.She sits down at the bar and orders a drink.My buddy thinks he's going to make the move of the night and sits down next to her.He starts by saying I don't remember you in school, did you graduate with us? I don't remember you.She looks him straight in the eye, and starts to move a little closer to him.My buddy thinks she wants him and he's reeling her in.She gets to within 6" of his face and says LOUDLY "Why Don't You Remember Me? You Should. Don't you remember throwing those snowballs at me with the rocks in them? Don't you remember slapping me in the face?Don't you remember calling me all those names?Don't you remember kicking me as I walked home from school? The whole room just stopped to listen to her rip this kid an *******.This went on for 5 minutes.The words flowed out her mouth better than any movie I ever saw.My buddy sank as low as you could on that barstool.As God as my witness, this girl waited 10 years to get even with this kid, just to humiliate him in front of his friends, and it worked to perfection.My friend didn't say 2 words the rest of the night.This was one of the funniest things I have ever witnessed in my life............Mark


----------



## Mamps (Feb 3, 2008)

Deleted my posting...


----------



## BigSmallieMike (Oct 20, 2005)

I am sorry to hear about your situation. I'm sure you can see from the number of responses that there are a lot of people out there willing to listen and share advice and personal experiences. And that's just from a bunch of fishing nuts from across the state!
Keep the people who matter to you and care for you in mind and make every effort to give these guys no heed. Make intelligent and practical decisions. Avoid situations if practical, walk away from conflicts if you can, and defend yourself if you must. Seek help from whoever you think is appropriate - be it family, teacher, counselor, youth leader, preacher, officer, or really anyone capable of helping you beyond offering the advice so widely shared in this thread. 
I understand it can be difficult, but remember that your worth is not found in what others think of you but in what you make of yourself. I wish you the best. Please let us know how you are doing as the school year progresses.


----------



## Fat Bill (Jan 16, 2006)

I truly hope that all works out well for you. I gotta say, that for the most part, the advice you have been given by this group is stellar. I'm proud to be associated with OGF. Look for some of them when you go fishing this spring and summer. Fishermen are always good to talk to.

Best of luck.
Fat Bill.

Remember: Never pick a fight with an ugly guy. He has nothing to loose.


----------



## PapawSmith (Feb 13, 2007)

Fishaolic, I'ts probably your wife, on your computer, trying to get you tossed from this site so you can sit on the couch and watch Lost with her. I'm now going to have to keep an eye on mine. 
Castmaster, You have recieved excellent advice and support here,short of those few posts last night. Thanks to Misfit for jumping in and terminating the irresponsable Moron. Misfit is a good guy. Unfortunatly you will encounter these type of people your whole life. How you decide to handle them now will be a valuable educational tool that you can utilize in the future. Violence, on your behalf, will lead to failure trust me. Carefull management of their negative behavior will teach you how to deal with this type of garbage when you encounter it again in the future, and you most definately will. Like others said please seek the support of your school Admin. That does not make you a "tattle-tale or narc" just a commited student that seeks a reasonable solution to an unreasonable situation. Keep your head up, you have read the testimony of several here regarding their past, all unashamed of who they are and where they have been, hell I lived in a tent for 7 months, thats how life is sometimes. Be happy with, and proud of, yourself and your family and don't ever let the true loosers in this world have any impact on how you live or how you feel about yourself. You have more friends in this thread alone than those morons have in the world. Good luck son and please confer with us all if this problem continues. Others have left their phone #s if you ever need immediate help call them, thats why they offered, or PM me. If you remember some months back on the Ash thread I said we need to sit down with a 12 pack of beer and a dictionary, beer is for me book is for you? Your spelling still sucks. And we ain't done that yet.


----------



## fishingfoolBG (Oct 30, 2007)

Hey buddy im 22 years old and was a camp counsler for past 2 summers. I can tell you that kids can be some of the meanist people. You just have to be stonger then them and dont let want they say get to you. that can be one of the hardest things but if you ignore them it will make you feel alot better. Try talking to any adult figure or someone from your school administration. Everyone goes through what you are going through. As you get older these ppl will mean nothing to you. Keep your head buddy


----------



## mjgood (Nov 20, 2007)

I came from the same type of environment when I was a child. My best suggestion is use this to the fullest for motivation. Work hard and excell at school, get a college degree and become thier boss. It is satisfying knowing I have made more of myself then most of them and you can do the same. When you have made something of yourself and you meet old schoolmates, you will have great satisfaction in knowing live is easier for you than them, and if you are real lucky, some will work for you as temps. What a feeling!


----------



## fishingfireman (Apr 3, 2006)

Sorry to hear about your situation, I have been there myself.
Remember some people are like trash trucks, they go around all day full of garbage and useless waste. And at the end of the day they need some place to dump it. Don't let them transfer their negativity to you. If you do then you get stuck carring the garbage. It's not easy but work hard and you will make it someday. Remember, if there is no option defend yourself. I had it out with the captain of the wrestling team. At the end of the fight we were both worn out and beat up but I earned respect from him and all the other kids, not by winning but by showing I had the balls not to take his sh#t. Unfortunately it has to come down to blows sometimes, but exhaust your other options first.


----------



## PapawSmith (Feb 13, 2007)

Spectacular anology Fishingfireman. It could not be said better.


----------



## Wiper Swiper (May 24, 2005)

Young man(?), are the time stamps on your posts set improperly, or are you allowed to spend several hours during the school day to surf the world wide web?

Where do you post from in the evenings? Do you have a computer and inter-net service at home?

Work on your education and forget those slow learners.


----------



## tomb (Oct 9, 2004)

You have already recieved lots of good advise. So I'll just say I'm sorry for your situation, look up, it will pass.


----------



## Musky Toyz (Feb 14, 2008)

My name is Barry Vance and i am a disabled Police officer of 12 years and football coach of 5 years and baseball coach of 15 years. I have seen a lot of situations that young men like your selvf have to endure while growing up. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You need to remember that the most important thing that matters in this situation and any other situation is your safety and well being. Look into your heart a listen to what it is telling you. I believe it is telling you to talk with someone in which you have here on this forum. Now you should sit down and try to explain this to your parents if that is possible. The next thing u need to do is the next day you return to school you should walk straight to the Principles office and ask him if you may speak in private. you should be honest with him and explain everything to him. And explain to him that sometimes you dont have Money for lunch. You have nothing to be ashamed of about this and you will find that your principal has ways of helping you in this situation. Remember these people are there to teach you and for your safety. If there is someone else in your scool you are more confortable talking to don't be hesitant to go straight to them and ask them to go to the office with you while you talk with your principal. I hope things work out well for you and remember always hold your head up, never look down. Loking down is the #1 sign of giving up. Stand tall, smile and listen to your heart. If you have any questions or you just need someone to talk to please son give me a call anytime day or night. Good luck! Barry Vance 419-399-4075


----------



## Fishers of Men (Jul 29, 2005)

One thing you are doing right is having much older friends, like the ones here.
When you hang out with a adult or older crowd so to speak, you learn by their mistakes and advice. Say for instance in advice given. 
Example: a person 30 yrs old, could share/give you 20 yrs experience. And another 50 yrs old passes 35-40 yrs experience on to you, add that up. You just gained 60 years of experience plus your age. Now lets see, How many have answered your post? What are the ages of all these people?
How much knowledge have you gained in such a short time here? 
Make a habit of having older friends.

Wish the best for you, keep your chin up and take the time to think about all that has been offered to you from these great posts and people who are your true friends. Think things thru before you speak. Think things thru before you act. Remember, haste , makes waste. Pray faithfully.
May God Bless


----------



## Wiper Swiper (May 24, 2005)

How do you guys know Castmaster is a boy? Where the heck is he/she anyway???


----------



## MadMac (May 2, 2005)

We know from some of his prior posts. Hopefully he hasn't replied due to lack of internet access and nothing else is wrong.


----------



## yonderfishin (Apr 9, 2006)

Kids only do that when they know it bothers you, if you can find some common ground and laugh with them, even if you are laughing at yourself believe it or not they will look at you differently and let up a little. But you have to open up and be friendly to them, while not letting them know they are bothering you. I went through the same thing in school and until I learned to laugh at myself in irony and sarcasm and show the bullies it dont bother me and I could actually be a little bit cool in spite of the situation I had a really hard time of it. Ultimately I ended up as friends with some of them. You can take control of the situation away from them.


----------



## uglykat23 (Jun 13, 2004)

you sound like me when i was in school, i lived in a 12 by 60 trialer up until i was 19 ,my dad wasnt around so my mom raised me , i spent 15 of those nineteen years on welfare because my mom couldnt find a stable job or had a stable vehicle we relied on welfare for food and money to pay bills , every one knew i was on welfare , so i got called a few names, trailer trash,food stamp champ and so on,i got into alot of fights and came home bloody more then once, the only way i could deal with it was to take long walks in the woods, that is where i met some of my best friends who helped me through the school years , bullies are bullies for on reason they are trying to make themselves feel better about themselves by makeing others feel like crap ,anyway on my long walks i had time to sit and think i thaught about it all running away,killing myself,everything the two people i found while going on my walks was my neighbor and god(no im not trying to push religion on you)my neighbor was 55 years older then me i ran into him on one of his mushroom hunting outtings he adopted me as his own grandson taught me how to fish ,woodworking,and working on cars he went through the same as i did growing up ,the second was god i started going to youth groups where i met my second family the never teased or cared i was on welfare , i guess my point is try to find some one older more mature that can teach you the joys of outdoors or find a youth group both of them are very helpful in dealing with every day life ,as for the bullies try to stay away from them as much as possible the bullies will get theyres in the end the usually grow up poor bad marriages and lots of kids they dont support they are looking for the easy way through life it wont get them anywhere, keep your head up and always know you are better then them ......by the way my neighbor at 82years old could still launch a 18 foot boat by himslef and have bait and every thing ready before i could even get there to help


----------



## Agent47 (Jun 27, 2006)

My story is similiar and has a fair ending.
I to grew up in a very high class wealthy neighborhood after moving during 
my jr high school year. The area has the cuyahoga river run right through it.
My family was very poor and being next to the school I was attending allowed
my fellow students to be well aware. Things at home were not fun and things at school were worse. I to came home bloody every other day due to me being to light to fight and to thin to win.I was told to commit suicide, burned in welding class and drug by cars. This community today has no idea of the skeletons there bulldog emblemed closet contains.!! YEARS I waited to get my revenge and created a list. However after an event full night of being rolled about at home or at school I would often go to a local railyard nearby 
and I was lucky to have some employee's take me in as an adopted kid untill 
they went home, today I have several decent jobs that i enjoy and truly know do to these fine individuals.REMEMBER, after high school it WILL END, NO ONE WILL JUDGE YOU ABOUT YOUR INCOME except those who have problems themselfs......Life will take a 360 degree change.. just hang in there.


----------



## catfish_hunter (May 31, 2005)

When I was in school there was a kid that used to mess with me all the time, I got tired of it and went straight to the dean who was also one of my football coaches, I told him the situation and the kid denied bullying me, So I went to the dean again and told him I was gonna kick this kids butt, He told me he didnt blame me cause he knew the kid was a bully, even though I never did, I just started hangin out with kids that were older than me and he stoped messin with me, Anyways, I graduated in 04 and I see this kid out now and then and we get along just fine...Basically what Im sayin is this, when you graduate and everyone is on the same page, it doesnt matter where the heck you grew up, what clothes you wear or anything like that...There are people that I went to kent with that were rich kids and people that were extremely less fortuneate, but we were there for the same reason and no one knew the difference of the kids that grew up in a 500k house or a 8k trailor...Someday these jackasses will grow up and you will probably end up much better off than they will...Keep your head up!


----------



## Wiper Swiper (May 24, 2005)

MadMac, I have reviewed castmaster's posts and there is nothing in them that indicates gender.

He/she also seems to post through-out the school day. 

I'm curious...aren't you?

We may very well have a victim of the same adolescent behavior that a large percentage of the members here have experienced.

Or...things may not be entirely as they seem.

My suggestion would be that the "youngster" confide in either one of their parents, or add a little insight as to why that's not an option.

Let's not form a posse just yet...


----------



## BigSmallieMike (Oct 20, 2005)

Wiper - as usual, you have successfully mixed reason with enough antagonism to come off as inconsiderate. Regardless of the validity of the source of the inquiry, it should be enough to see there is strong support out there for anyone else who may be struggling with a similar situation.
You're not necessarily saying anything wrong - you just aren't saying it well.


----------



## HawgHunter (Apr 13, 2004)

Lots of good advice already given. Castmaster if you want to talk to someone your own age about it PM me. I have worked with our church youth group and we have some great kids who have been through similar situations, and much worse. We are also VERY close to you so distance is not a problem. The best advice I have heard so far is not to start believing what the bullies are saying. I have always felt that noone's opinion of you matters more than your own. As long as you believe in yourself to he&#37;% with what anyone else thinks of you.

Scott


----------



## MadMac (May 2, 2005)

He may only have access at school.


----------



## tcba1987 (Jun 22, 2004)

it is easy for someone to say ignore them and they will go away but lets get real people ..............that doesnt work. i have a 14 yr old son who is in 8th grade ..........he is one of the smallest kids in his school (80 lbs) he is a good wrestler and can take care of hisself. he was and still is being terrorized by a group of boys that hang together because they are from the well-to-do families, they flick his ears .........punch him in the groin..........steal his hat........steal his jacket..........deflate the tires on his bike.......i mean these kids are being NASTY. well for the first 8-10 wks of school i told him to ignore them..........then i told him to go to the principal or guidance counselor about it, they TALKED to the boys involved and the next day my son got beat up by 3 of them after school and they took his shorts and made him walk home in his underwear. he even TRIED to fight the one boy who instigates him the most (in self defense) the other BOYS involved got a lecture , my son got a 3 day out of school suspension. ive tried talking to the principal.......the guidance counselor..........even the police and i always get the (its just boys being boys excuse). well it isnt horse play ..........it is WRONG.........it needs to be stopped .............you tell me how to stop it ......id really like to know !!! our school has a anti-bullying program that my son attended they tried to tell him how to ignore and how to TALK his way out of bad situations ............it doesnt work !!! 

i am transferring my son to another school at the end of this school year, i have too..........im afraid hes gonna end up getting physically hurt bad and im sure if that happened the school would "TALK" to the other kids involved !!! its kinda hard to get much else done when their moms and dads are on the school board and influential people in this area.


----------



## catfish_hunter (May 31, 2005)

I agree 100% with what Brian said, It is REDICULOUS what kids put other kids thru...Guys and Girls alike...It IS bullnookie what goes on alot of times at school with adults, someone being bullied alot of times is like someone trying to make a sports team, your NAME has alot to do with things, If you have the name everyone will kiss your a$$...Another thing to remember is this, you dont have to prove anything to anyone at your school or anything like that, there is ONE person that you have to impress in life, and that is the man upstairs!!!


----------



## bassmastermjb (Apr 8, 2004)

tcba1987, sounds like you son needs to carry a can of mace with him.Simple, but effective.It's not against the law to defend yourself........Mark


----------



## Nipididdee (Apr 19, 2004)

not to get off track- but the instance you explained tcba is a law enforcement matter all the way. 

I would URGE you to file a complaint for assualt even at this later stage- DEMAND from the jurisdictional agency that you be allowed to do so.

Things have changed dramatically in the juvenile courts, post-Columbine, with the type of matters you spoke of. 

If that kinda report came with an assualt complaint in my county there would be very severe consequences for any youth(s) adjudicated on that offense.

There are indeed some instances of mutal combatants that you let the blood fall where it does- your son's situtation as described is NOT one of them.

I'd be all over the police- the parent's- the school administrators until action was taken...don't stop until it is.

It's a new day and age folks - those who live in the past wake up with headlines...

nip


----------



## NUM1FIRE (Nov 12, 2005)

can u get some type of restraining order ? or something along them lines


----------



## LEJoe (Jun 27, 2006)

It sounds like tcba1987, you have a real problem there. It is NOT a unique one. I hope somebody on here will say something that will help you.

No Dad in their right mind wants to hear about their kid being bullied at school. But if he does, what can he do about it? Seems like you've done alot so far but with little results. You may have overlooked one important angle of your situation. The parents of the bullies.

I had a simuliar situation that came to mind when I read your post. I went through basically the same things you did, getting the same run around that you did, until I couldn't take it anymore. So I got the names of the bullies and went right to their house and knocked on the door. Spoke with the parents and tried to be civil and polite. I exsplained the situation to them as I saw it, and let them know EXACTLY what I intended to do about it, if this continued. More times than not they were unaware of this stuff going on and PROMICED to handle it right away. I made it clear to them that I am coming to them FIRST because I am a parent too and my kid is no angel either. BUT... the actions of their kids is unexceptable to me and my family and I'm just doing what a reasonable Dad does when faced with something like this.
I WILL NOT COME TO YOU NEXT TIME. Amazing how well that works.

Get the police envolved if you have too. That's where I agree with Nipididdee. The parents and the law. Let the law work for you man. You do not have to put up with this kind of BS! After you have exhausted all the avenues that you know of, talk with the police. I believe they look at things alittle differently. They are not clouded by emotions like us Dad's are alot of times. They are strickly business. Sometime that's just what we need. Good luck to you.


----------



## Wiper Swiper (May 24, 2005)

Nipididdee wrote-- *"Things have changed dramatically in the juvenile courts, post-Columbine, with the type of matters you spoke of." *

Yes they have...and based on my personal experience in raising 13 and 14 year old boys, they've changed for the worse. The social engineers amongst us believe that the state makes a far better "parent" than a child's parents, and have enacted "zero tolerance" policys at every level to shove their point down our throats. School administrators must except that corpal punishment "never" modified behavior, and "time-out" in detention is just as effective. Juvenile prosecuters show no mercy on first time offenders or their parents, regardless of the circumstances. Judges don't judge, they follow the script.

Christ, we've even learned that field day was harming children with all the awards and recognition, and we're just better off letting everyone "feel good" about participating.

Spare me...

We deny what is inherent, relish in expanding the definition of "victim", and encourage the average to remain average. 

Kids are cruel...always have been. Today, there are no degrees of bullying. There's just that horrible buzz word that everyone rallies around, and errantly believes with more legislation we can eliminate it. Kinda like believing hate crime laws stop bigotry and racism. 

I'm surprised no one has encouraged Castmaster to sue for damages. Speaking of the lad/lassie, where is he/she???

BTW--I read somewhere that the Columbine murderers broke around 40federal and state statutes. No one termed them as "bullies" at the time. But, I'm sure there are those here that believe with a little more state control of our children, the tragedy could have been overted.


----------



## Nipididdee (Apr 19, 2004)

When I started working in the juvenile/criminal justice system the O.R.C. was about 2.5 inches thick...now, although I haven't measured, I'm guessing 6-7 inches...

Your passion is strong wiper, I agree legislation is not an "answer" for the big picture.

*It is* a new day and age- paradigms change... you ought try working right in the middle of it, I couldn't think of a better job to positively impact the exact perceptions you identified.

bottom line- go see the police tcba...


----------



## Wiper Swiper (May 24, 2005)

Let me make sure I understand where you're coming from. When you write-- *"I couldn't think of a better job to positively impact the exact perceptions you identified."* Are you talking about my perceptions, or the perceptions of the majority?


----------



## misfit (Apr 5, 2004)

let's please not take this thread away from it's original intent.


----------



## Wiper Swiper (May 24, 2005)

What was the original intent, Misfit?

Seems to me that the original poster could give a crap less about the many heart-felt responses he has gotten. Looks to me like it may have taken a constructive turn.


----------



## misfit (Apr 5, 2004)

> i need some advice on how to handle this . do you guys have any ideas?


the fact that the original poster has not replied,is not license to take a "constuctive turn".i think we all know how those turns don't always turn out to be as constructive as intended.as evidence,you only need look at previous threads that went awry.
my post was just a friendly reminder to those who might take a wrong turn somewhere down the line.


----------



## Wiper Swiper (May 24, 2005)

You write*--"the fact that the original poster has not replied,is not license to take a "constuctive turn".*

The constructive turn is related to the subject and relevant to the many responses in this thread. To summarize..."How do we deal with the timeless bully when raising the next generation." The orginal poster has not seen fit to re-direct the conversation back towards his/her particular circumstance. He/she has however commented in another thread that he/she, "beat the kid up." Since the thread was obviously a waste of time for most, is it wrong to possibly make lemon-aid out of a lemon?


----------



## misfit (Apr 5, 2004)

ok,since he has posted in other threads while this one has been running,he apparently chose not to reply here.therefore since the thread has in your words,been an obvious waste of time,there's no reason to open a lemonade stand,in which case it is being closed.


----------

